The Asian Zodiac

Okay, I'll admit it: I got the idea for a tamagotchi horoscope from something that Mad Cow wrote. I remember being annoyed at the fact that all the horoscope names in his version were hackneyed anglicized Japanese words, like Subaru and Sushi. (How would you Scots like it if we came up with a Scottish Horoscope, with signs like "Haggis" and "Loch Ness Monster"?). Furthermore, most of the signs were wrong; Capricorn characteristics (studious nature, sobriety, stubborn nature) were attributed to the sign corresponding to Sagittarius (the carefree joker of the Western Zodiac).

But it did get me thinking. There already is a Japanese zodiac (stolen from the Chinese, I believe), and in ancient times the zodiac was also applied to the four directions and the 12 hours in a day. So an ancient clan of ninja could, for example, plan to attack such and such a castle from the direction of the Horse in the Hour of the Ox (ie, from the North between 1 and 3 am). Although that's a terribly stereotypical image I just used, it neatly segues into my "Tamagotchi Horoscopes".

I basically took the hours of the zodiac listed in The Chinese Horoscopes Library: Horse by Kwok Man-ho, added a liberal dash of Western Astrology, and tinkered with them so that they'd fit the Japanese zodiac. So the Rat became a Mouse, the Rooster a Bird (the Japanese word is actually "tori", a homonym for "bird" which is written as the word for Chicken. I just thought Bird sounded better), the Ram a sheep and the Pig a Boar. If these aren't imaginative enough for you, you can supply your own substitutes: the Hour of the Mouse could become the Hour of the Mamechi, and so on.

I apologize in advance if it's a little confusing. Mad Cow's version (if he still has it) is a little simpler, since the signs have corresponding hours rather than time slots. You may wish to e-mail him for his version of the Zodiac.

Although the words "tamagotchi" and "tam" show up repeatedly, these profiles should fit any virtual pet, and even humans too.

The Signs of the Oriental Zodiac are:

The Mouse

A tam born in the Hour of the Mouse will often be independant, possibly selfish, and may have a short temper. Don't be surprised if it refuses to let you win when playing games. Just be patient, and give it plenty of love... and candy. The equivalent Western Sun Sign is Aries.

The Ox

A tam born in the Hour of the Ox may be quite difficult as a babychi... Losing hearts quickly, getting sick easily, and so on. Don't be too hard on it; it doesn't mean to be troublesome, it just needs some extra care. It should enjoy a long and healthy life after that stage, though. The equivalent sign is Taurus.

The Tiger

A Tiger Tam is a lively tam. They tend to go through a "difficult" phase as a kodomo-chi (tamachi, tongaritchi, kuchi- or hashitamachi), but will have better luck as an adult-chi. The equivalent sign is Gemini.

The Rabbit

A Rabbit tam may be jealous of the attention you give your other v-pets. They can become very demanding, but will probably ease up as an adult-chi and reveal its basic loving nature. The equivalent sign is Cancer.

The Dragon

A tam born in the hour of the Dragon will be quick-witted, determined, and may age quickly (just a guess on my part, since a tam hatched 6am-ish will fall asleep quickly, and then wake up later at 9 am, 2 years old). They may be fond of sweets, and rather vain. The equivalent sign is Leo.

The Snake

A tam born in the hour of the Snake will be generous and friendly. It may not get along with other virtual pets, however, due to its need for privacy (ie, will not make a happy digimon, nano-fighter or osuchi/mesuchi.) Oddly enough, both tams that I've hatched in this time period became the secret characters. The equivalent sign is Virgo.

The Horse

My sign! (I was born in the Year of the Horse Within the Gate). A Horsy tam will be active, clever, and obstinate. It enjoys travel and extravagance. On a personal note, my Horsy Tams have turned into Gingiro- and Pochi-chi, and died while at movie theatres or the Pacific National Exhibition (I guess that about covers the "love of travel" bit...). The equivalent sign is Libra.

The Sheep

A Tam born in the hour of the Sheep will be also be clever, active, and possibly a little shy. This tam will probably be rather needy as an adult-chi, and will need extra care. The equivalent sign is Scorpio.

The Monkey

A Tam born in the hour of the Monkey will be attractive, not just looks-wise but personality-wise as well. It will be cheerful, and fairly happy-go-lucky. The equivalent sign is Sagittarius.

The Bird

This tam will be a very difficult kodomo-chi. We're talking major rebellion here; this one's going to need a whole lotta discipline. The Bird-tam isn't a bad tam as such though; it's trustworthy, kind, and warm-hearted. It doesn't mean to be such a pain, really it doesn't. The equivalent sign is Capricorn.

The Dog

The Doggy tam is brave, capable, and hard-working. It can also be impatient and vain, though. In terms of life span, this tam would probably prefer quality to quantity; in other words, it'll rather die young, but full of candy, than survive to a ripe old age on nothing but bread and water. The equivalent sign is Aquarius.

The Boar

The equivalent sign is Pisces. This tam will likely be soft-hearted, very caring, and a little shy. It may not be as out-going as other virtual pets (eg. Nanofighters and Digimons) but will probably surround itself with a couple close, trusted friends (ie. would make a great osuchi/mesuchi or GameBoy Tama 2). It maybe easily upset, but will forgive and forget just as easily.

To point out the exceedingly obvious, this is just for fun. If you feel that your Oriental or Western Zodiac Sign has been unjustly represented, feel free to e-mail me. But please don't e-mail me complaining that all the entries sound the same: It's quite difficult to put something like "Your thrifty nature will be useful at work and at home" in a Tamagotchi context.

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